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WORD OF THE DAY - paroxysm - Any sudden and violent emotion or action; an outburst; a fit. I had one over the weekend when I realized a cat had been locked in my garage over night and pissed on everything.
ON THIS DAY -
1862, President Abraham Lincoln issued the preliminary Emancipation Proclamation, declaring all slaves in rebel states should be free as of Jan. 1, 1863. If memory serves, the rebel states didn't immediately comply. In fact, it took several upper management meetings to finally make it happen...some of them were quite tense.
2004 CBS-owned TV stations were fined $550,000 by the Federal Communications Commission for showing Janet Jackson's exposed right breast during the Super Bowl halftime show.(An appeals court threw out the fine in July 2008 when it was unanimously decided that her breast was not really that attractive.)
BIRTHDAYS -
Tommy Lasorda is 81, Tom Felton from the "Harry Potter" movies is 21 and Johnette Napolitano from "Concrete Blonde" is 51 today!!
NEWS!!
As I was perusing the Internet looking for stories that might warrant a good old fashioned exagerating and politically incorrect chiding, I found such topics as Iran's growing nuclear capabilities, all the sick kids in China from the bad milk, a helicopter that crashed into a house yadda yadda yadda....Then I saw an article about a nude rollerblader in Portland Oregon. I read the headline and kept going, I figured it musta been a dude cuz the sex of the naked perp wasn't mentioned in the headline. With stories like that it's always a dude, weather it be a soccer game or a live tv show...it's a guy with his junk swinging around like a propeller on an old WWII plane trying to start. Thankfully I revisited the story though when nothing in the other stories jumped out at me because it wasn't a dude....IT'S A CHICK!! Ok...but it's gotta be an ugly chick right? Hot babes just don't do that shit. NOPE! Turns out the naked rollerblader is known as "Earth Friend Gen", and she apparently does this all the time. I didn't know this about Portland Oregon, but occasional nude bike rides draw police only for crowd control and shows featuring live sex acts are protected as free speech. Oregon has just become my new favorite state. There is a link on my site at www.jacksassradio.com to a gallery of uncensored photos of Earth Fried Gen doing her thing. I saluted Gen in the only way appropriate this morning in the front yard, and thanks to a stiff breeze it didn't take very long.
CLICK HERE TO SEE EARTH FRIEND GEN
Finally today I wanted to comment on a commercial I saw last night while I was watching "Fringe"...which by the way is a damn cool show co-created by J.J. Abrahms...one of the guys who made "Lost". Anyway, several times during the show they ran ads for a hybrid version of the Cadillac Escalade. Haha, now...I think hybrid technology is cool and will eventually have it's place, but only if it makes sense and is dramatically better than the normal versions of those vehicles. During this commercial, a snobby dickhead of a spokesman is driving the Hybrid Escalade commenting on different things "they should hybrid". Suddenly "to hybrid" is a verb. "Hey man...I'm gonna be "hybriding" my moped later if you wanna swing by.". Finally he says "they should hybrid this!...Oh..did I just spoil a secret?" At that point he may as well have put his pinky in the corner of his mouth ala Dr. Evil. Then they boast that the Hybrid version of the Escalade gets 40% better mileage than the regular one...but never say what that is....until the end, and you have to pause the commercial to read the fine print where it says "12mpg". Twelve, twelve god damn miles per gallon is worth bragging about. That's akin to Verne Troyer bragging about the size of his mini-me. General Motors deserves to go under of they're actually going to market jokes like that to us.
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